What Now?

What now has been been the reoccurring question in my mind for the last year, knowing that much in my life is and has been changing.....There are so many exciting milestones that will be happening along with the changes. I wrote a little something and wanted to share it. Some of you will read it in my upcoming "Over The Top" newsletter. But for those that don't read junk mail, missed the list or whatever, I wanted to share with you.

I should feel footloose and fancy free! Why don’t I? I no longer have sleepless nights, runny noses, ear aches, trips to the doctors, bouts with Croup, diaper rash, potty training, or even tardiness to deal with! My babies are not babies anymore!

Now what? I’ve been talking to other moms that are in the same boat and I’ll be darned if we’re not all seemingly floundering! It seems we are stuck or in a holding pattern. For so long we’ve been singing the same ole song, “Get up, do your home work, don’t smart mouth, wipe off that smirk!” Now they are older. College bound or should be. Some how now we must figure out a way to just let them make mistakes. Let go. What do we do with all of this pent up energy?

I suppose that’s what started the Beanie Babies craze. I really doubt it was some demanding little kid screaming for “Baldy” or else. I’m certain it was some, no life having, mother struggling with her own empty nest issues that took up a new obsession to fill her time. It’s like the same predictable behavior of the woman that is turning 40. She’ll probably never look better because she’s scared to death of aging and weight gain, so she diets, gets a trainer and works out like a fiend so she can attend her own 40th party to look like Barbi and have her first real meal and piece of cake in over a year. The next day she forfeits the gym because she’s now liberated and who cares. She’s 40. Or what about the woman that continues to care so she can be the “sexy grandma” type? Now that’s scary.

There has to be a happy medium. I am on a quest to find it. I am just about the empty-nester. Some things about it are great. Other’s leaving me shrugging, asking now what? The same with being 40. Some things about it are ok. I’m not so hard on myself or others (mainly my poor husband). Other things are down right funky! Like excessive hair growth on ONE arm! Please, tell me there is some kind of middle ground here. I’m looking and I’ll let you know what I come up with.

By the way, I commissioned (for free) a talented young man that is supposed to write a song about all this stuff. A good, mushy, emotional, soulful, heartwarming, rewarding, song, that speaks of thanks and praise to all of us sacrificial moms left wondering....what now? I wonder how it's going.... Love and hugs and I won't say this again, at least for another few years,

HAPPY LEAP YEAR!